What's Next?

It's 5AM here and I am still awake...

I am feeling lost at the moment...

In the past months, I have been trying to make myself healthy. Personality wise, I can honestly say that I am better in that department. I have set my standards and boundaries. I know people who I will trust and treasure. Health wise, I haven't done any exercise since I came back apart from cleaning my room and sorting stuffs at home(after the flood, there are so much to sort out. We experienced 6 feet deep flood. We lost all the things on the ground floor). I am now back to smoking. It's bad but it relaxes me. Career wise, I am a total mess. Yesterday, I tried searching for jobs online. I haven't submitted any CV's yet but I am looking into jobs. There are few that interest me but I don't know which one to apply for. I am overwhelmed. I don't know what I want although I have an idea what I want to do. I've been looking into different unrelated fields. I looked into Hotel Management - I like the challenge of everyday task, Tourism - I really love to travel and to organise, the list is endless. I was told by friends that I should apply for all jobs and have a feel to it. If I liked it then I should stick to it. It's difficult when you don't feel the pressure to work. The parentals don't pressure me into working. I hate that I am lost. I hate feeling like a total mess. I need my centre. I need to sort this soon.

What's next???